Extending Acceptance to the Locker Room

This week, the NMH community is paying extra attention to matters of diversity and acceptance. On Monday, a pair of guest speakers spoke to the community and described their parallel experiences as gay athletes.

Andrew Goldstein, a former professional lacrosse player, and David Farber, a hockey player, both came out of the closet in college. They now speak on behalf of GForce Sports, a group of LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender) athletes and allies whose mission is to “advocate for equality in sports regardless of sexual orientation.”

Farber and Goldstein’s visit was part of NMH’s recognition of Ally Week, a nationwide celebration of safe, healthy, and respectful school environments and of the allies who stand up against anti-LGBT language, bullying, and harassment. The men spoke at an all-school meeting and held a separate training workshop for faculty and coaches.

The week ends with NMH’s annual fall Diversity Summit, which encourages students and faculty to discuss issues of multiculturalism and social justice. The summit features “Incognito,” a one-hour theatrical presentation focusing on race, identity, diversity, and stereotypes, by writer and actor Michael Fosberg, and a lecture on defining diversity by Rodney Glasgow, director of diversity and community relations and dean of students at Worcester Academy.

Goldstein and Farber were born into the world of athletics: Goldstein’s father snuck a hockey puck into his son’s hospital incubator; Farber started playing hockey at the age of 4.

Both men also realized early that they were gay—a difficult position in which to be in their respective high schools, where locker room culture promoted homophobic language and stereotyping. As a result, Farber and Goldstein remained closeted, afraid that if the told the truth, they would be ostracized.

“I never had any doubt who I was attracted to,” Goldstein said during the Monday all-school meeting. “I was so afraid that I’d be found out… that I was a fraud.”

Goldstein and Farber not only discussed with the NMH community their personal experiences, but also how students, faculty, and staff could make the school’s playing fields and locker rooms safe and welcoming places for everyone.

“It’s really easy to bash a faceless enemy,” Goldstein said. “Dave and I are here to put a face on this. Don’t let it be okay to use degrading language.”

When Goldstein and Farber came out of the closet, at Dartmouth College and the University of Pennsylvania, respectively, their friends, family members, and teammates offered their love and support. These were their allies.

“An ally challenges him- or herself every day and resolves to be a better friend, person, and teammate,” Farber said. “I’m confident you all are more than capable of rising to that challenge.”